Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Happy Birthday to my Mom

Happy Birthday, Mom! I can't believe it is the second birthday where you aren't here for me to make you a cake or get you something special. To at least feel like I'm doing something for you, I will do what I've been doing at each holiday. I will contribute to your Kathy Wallis Memorial Fund in the amount I would have spent on a gift for you. I know that would make you happy knowing it is a small step in helping others with ALS.

I'm doing OK - as you know. But, I have my moments. The other day in the scrapbook store when they asked my name and yours came up, I got really choked up as I told them you had passed away and they could take your name out of the computer. The lady in the store and I both ended up crying!

This whole thing still seems surreal. I don't know when it will ever feel real. I still feel sorry for myself from time-to-time when others talk about their Moms. Especially right now with the wedding plans. But, how cool is it that you are the only one coming to our wedding? I really try to look at it that way.

I love you and think of you all the time. As OJ said to me yesterday, "Courtney, your Mom will never really be gone. She lives on in you." Happy Birthday, Mom. I love you and always will.

2 comments:

theinnermostbox said...

Love you, Courtney! Praying for you.

Jen in Canada said...

I know how you feel, Courtney. My mom passed away 6 years ago after a lengthy battle with cancer and I still miss her SO MUCH! Her birthday just came and we started a new tradition: having a cake for her and singing "happy birthday", even though she's no longer with us physically. My mom missed seeing me get married, too and now she's a grandma - the cake thing is a way to (hopefully) make her and her life more tangible for my son who's only 22 months old. I'm also making a special scrapbook about her for my little boy.

We NEVER forget!

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