I started this blog for fun - to share pictures, fun stories, recipes... but this week I learned a great lesson. I also do it because it is a great outlet for me. I have had this gnawing need to get my feelings out in words. I have experienced so many emotions this week I don't want to forget - for myself, for my husband and especially, for our new baby daughter.
Dearest Elyse -
A week ago, I was still pregnant with you. My water broke at 1:40 p.m. on Saturday, September 11. I will share with you later how you came into this world. For now, I will tell you that it was scary - for my health and yours. Labor was something our bodies didn't like and it was dangerous at times for both of us. Fortunately, everything changed at 2:49 a.m. last Sunday, September 12. As soon as you were born, your heart rate was perfect, my blood pressure was down and you were 100% healthy. Everything we could have ever asked for. What an absolute blessing.
From the moment you were laid on my chest and the nurses stopped cleaning you off, you stared right at me with your wide eyes. I was shocked at how calm, but alert you were. I experienced so many emotions all at once. I admit I did make everyone in the room laugh when the second thing I said after "Hello, Baby!" was "Wow, I can't believe that was just in me!"
They took you away to measure, weigh and clean you up and brought you back to my arms where you snuggled right in.
Your Daddy and I were so thrilled, TIRED, but oh so happy!
The nurses gave you right to me when you were born. When we brought family and friends in they wanted to hold you, but no... You needed to be held next by one very important person. Daddy was next to hold you before we started sharing you with others. He was so happy and I loved watching him look at you!
I haven't been able to sleep much at all since you were born. It isn't because you aren't sleeping. You are such a good baby. I can't sleep because I constantly think about you, your Daddy and making sure you are cared for. I've been told repeatedly to rest when you rest, but whenever I close my eyes, my head fills up and I cannot sleep. When I do, it doesn't last long. I'm easily awoken or startled, need to check on you and we start all over again.
I have fallen even more deeply in love with your Daddy watching how well he has taken care of both of us this week. I have said repeatedly it has been the hardest week of my life, but surely the best. When you were still in my belly, I worried about how bringing you home would be and how it would affect Daddy and me. All I can tell you is how happy we both are. Our home will never be the same. You have brought a whole new level of joy and love to our family. We are head over heels in love with you. You have one very protective Mama and Daddy. Wow. Watch out world because I am very confident that your Daddy and I will always do whatever we can within our control to keep you loved, safe and away from hurt.
Happy one week birthday, baby girl! Thank you for changing our lives for the better. You already have so many people in love with you! You are just an easy girl to fall in love with! We couldn't be more proud and thankful for your health, sweetness, "snackable" cheeks and how you have lit up our life.
We love you more than words. Now, let's hope that since Mama got this out, she can sneak in just a couple more hours of rest until you wake up.
Love you dearly, sweet baby girl.
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